Bring on 7th Grade!

Well tomorrow starts another school year.  Although I am not looking forward to endless homework, I am looking forward to getting my schedule back.  My family works better on a schedule.  People often tease us because we are so routine.  But I am excited about new teachers, new adventures and all the other great things that come with the school year.  I've got the backpacks loaded, food for lunches bought and all the new clothes washed and dried.  I think I am prepared, except for one thing.  Even though I have one entering 3rd grade, I am not prepared for my oldest to enter Middle School.

I know so many of my friends are going through different emotions right now.  I have some with kids starting Kindergarten and some who are starting High school.  I know others who have sent their babies off to college.  So, I don't know why the approaching of this middle school year is hitting me so hard.  I have so many mixed emotions about seeing my first born starting to enter a new phase of life.  I am a pretty tough mom.  I don't freak out when they get hurt.  I talk pretty firmly to my boys.  I am not real gentle like other moms.  I have to be tough or they will run me all over.  With that being said, these emotions are coming at an unusual time.

Maybe it is because I am beginning to see my little boy starting to change into a young man.  I remember the first day Bryan and I brought him home.  We sat him down in his carrier on the coffee table.  We both made eye contact and asked "What do we do now?"  Nothing had prepared us for the moment when our precious, quiet newborn, turned into a screaming nightmare at 9 p.m.   I remember us both crying our eyes out because we were so exhausted and frustrated.  To be honest, Christian was a difficult baby.  He had colic and cried all the time for the first few months of his life.  I would beg Bryan to not go to work and leave me all day alone.  I would hear other moms talk about how wonderful having a baby was and how they never wanted to put their babies down.  I thought I was all alone in my feelings.  But once he was on a routine and eating cereal and lactose free formula, and after loads of prayer, he settled down.  Once he became a toddler, he became a daddy's boy and hasn't changed since.

Christian was a pretty easy toddler and young child.  He was my blanket baby, thumb sucker and nightlight kid.  People told me he would never give up the thumb but he said when he was 4 he would.  That promise was kept.  He was also my sleepwalker who had night terrors.   After many powerful prayers from myself and other prayer partners, he stopped having them.  He has also given me the opportunity to go to the ER on more than one occasion.  That child has had a couple of sets of stitches and always on his face.  There have been other instances when he may have needed stitches and we just didn't go and settled for super glue.  He and I have very similar personality traits so we tend to knock heads.  We have had stand offs and I was determined to win.  Those were the times when I pulled out the "because I said so" line.  I always disliked that line but sometimes it just fits.
He was always the kid at daycare who did not follow the crowd.  I remember asking his teacher if he had friends and she said yes.  He just preferred playing with one or two at a time.  He is still like that.  He was content playing by himself and lining up all of his hot wheel cars or Noah's ark animals.
When he hit the age old enough to play sports, Bryan always had him outside throwing a ball to him.  He knew how to squash a bug, and which way the laces where suppose to be on a ball at a very young age.  When he started school, I was excited!  I thought school would be great for him.  He has always been a great student and done well in school. 

So I ask again, why do I have some anxiety?  Maybe because I hear my son's voice changing.  To be honest, I thought he was having allergy issues for several months.  Maybe it is because he is shaving now.  Maybe it is because daddy is no longer coach and I am no longer team mom.  He is now entrusted to his school coaches and teachers.  Maybe it is because he works out with me and is starting to care about bettering himself physically.  Maybe it is because I am seeing the little things we have taught him starting to stick.  Like the other day when we went to work out I had my keys and phone laying by my mat.  Christian saw a man coming our way and he put my keys under my mat and never took his eyes off the man.  It was one of those moments when I thought maybe he is listening to the things we have taught him.  And maybe it is because I remember what middle school was like. 

Middle School was a super fun time for me.  It was the time when I turned from a shy kid into a social one.  I wasn't scared anymore to talk in front of a crowd.  I also remember it being a time when guys popped our bra straps, although I was told they don't do that anymore.  I also was introduced to certain words for the first time and realized that boys always find it humorous to make loud gas noises.  It was also a time of boys and girls starting to notice each other and zits appearing in the most prominent places just in time for picture day.  It is a time when you know you are old enough to be left alone, but in reality, you still need your parents for more than you want to admit.
Yes he will survive!  And I know all of you dads are probably rolling your eyes at me but you had a mom too.  Maybe I don't vocalize it, but in my prayer time, I am crying out to God for my 7th grader.  I am praying for his future.  I am praying for protection and safety.  I am praying for wisdom of when to hold on and when to let go.  I am praying for finances, because let's face it, these boys are expensive too.  I am praying that he is tough on the football field but he is compassionate enough to help his friends out when needed.  I am praying he approaches school and sports with confidence but stays humble through success.  I am praying he waits as long as possible to have a girlfriend but is still a gentlemen to his girl classmates.  To be honest, I am just praying!  It is the only thing I know how to do.  I am so excited to see Christian's life unfold.  I have held him when he was a screaming infant and I have spanked him when he was a defiant toddler.  I am now satisfied with the side-hug that Christian so graciously offers me.  So I thank God that He made me the mother of a brown-eyed boy who is no longer at my eye level.  Christian has taught me so much about being a parent.  I know that no matter what job I have outside the home, that being a mom to that boy is the most honored position I could ever have.

So I send him off tomorrow to a new school where he will start a new path.  I know God goes before him.  I know that He knows the very number of hairs on his head.  I don't even know that and I gave birth to that boy.  I know that God has a plan for his life.  I feel super blessed to know that I will be a part of Christian Bryce Rhodes' future.  So bring on 7th grade!  I can say with boldness "God's got this!"

Football-A Team Sport

Recently I was asked why I had a blog.  And if I actually thought people were interested in my life.  Well I don't really know if people are all that interested but I really write to get my thoughts out on paper.  It helps me reminisce at times and other times it helps me to heal.  If someone can relate to my experiences then it makes it all worth it.  I do want to say thank you again to those of you who choose to read my thoughts and who keep coming back to read some more.

Most of you have endured my posts about basketball over the last several months.  If you're not a fan of the basketball court then you will be happy to know that I am moving on to football.  I love football and always have!  I use to film football practices and games in high school and it was such a fun experience.  I was engrossed in the Friday night light scene.  I never was a cheerleader even though I always wanted to be.  Believe me I can't even get a couple of inches off of the ground and couldn't have even competed with those girls if I tried.  I loved the sound of the band marching down the hallway on game days.  Till this day I will watch football even if I am all by myself with none of my boys around.  I love the drive and passion of football fans and players.

Both my boys play and I have enjoyed every second watching them.  My oldest will enter Middle School this year and it will be his first time to tryout for a school sport.  I have a lot of anxiety about this.  I want him to excel and to do his best.  I hope that all the fundamentals that his daddy has taught him since he was little will pay off.  I pray he stays protected on that field and has a season free of injuries.  I have tried to talk to him about following his dreams and having a passion for what he does whether it is football or something else.  We have talked about mental toughness and being a leader.  We watched a documentary called "Undefeated" the other night and I loved a line in that movie.  The coach said "Football doesn't build character, football reveals character."  This is so true!  You have to have good character and the things you do and the experiences of life will reveal that character.  Just like you can have faith and love the Lord when everything is going good but when you are in the valley and at your lowest, do you still praise His name?  Do you still have faith?  I pray that my son will always have good character.  I want him to be tough physically and emotionally.  I want him to be passionate about everything he does and to let that passion lead him into the things God has willed for his life.  His character is more important to me than an actual win or loss.

Now it is Bo's first time to play tackle football.  He is built totally different than my oldest and has a different work ethic so not sure how this will all end up.  He doesn't have the fundamentals down as well as my oldest did at his age.  Part of this is the result of being the second child and us not spending as much one on one time with him as we did Christian.  He is happy being out on the field with his friends.  I watched him for the first time during his scrimmage.  My frustration came out because he is so passive and when you are on the line, you can't be.  But anytime a team member was down he was patting them on the back and offering a word of encouragement.  He has such a sweet demeanor so it is a little tough trying to teach him to be "mean" in the football sense.  One thing is for sure, he smiles every time he comes off the field.  So needless to say, he is a work in progress.  Neither one of my boys has ever been overly aggressive so years ago I would have told you they would have never lasted in such vigorous sport.  But they both have surprised me over the years and I look forward to many more seasons of watching them play.

Now why do I love this sport so much?  I can't help but relate it to life.  I really do love any team sport because it is all about unity.  When you are on offense your goal is to get that ball into the end zone to score a touchdown.  You have a line that is there to protect the quarterback and ensure that their man with the ball gets down the field.  They have to give all of themselves physically and mentally to make sure the opposing side doesn't get their man down.  Are you following me?  In life you have to have an offensive line.  You need people in your life that will always be there to protect you no matter what giants stand in your way.  They are the people who say "you can't get to her unless you get through me first."  In the same respect, a QB is a leader.  They have to be tough.  They have to be able to read the field.  They have to have confidence in their line and also know that they don't get the ball off without the protection of that line.  Don't take those who are close to you for granted.  They are the ones willing to stand up for you.  You have to be a good example. It is imperative that you build them up. Quarterbacks also have to have confidence in their receivers and running backs.  They have to know that whatever I throw at you, you are going to catch it and we are going to make it down to the end zone.  And when they do, the whole team scores.  Sometimes you throw your thoughts, your passions, your dreams to people who you know will hold them close and help you to accomplish those things.  Because when they rejoice in your successes they know it benefits them as well.  Hold on closely to those who cheer with you during your successes and achievements.  

It is extremely important in life to not become over confident.  You can't use people. You can't do for people always expecting something in return.  You are where you are because someone along the way, aside from God, has helped you.  Parents raised you, friends helped you move, someone made a call on your behalf to put in a good word for a job.  Strangers bought you dinner.  I believe so much in divine appointments.  I believe God places people in your life.  We are a part of the same team, God's team.  It hurts my heart when some people say "well I don't need anyone."  I believe we all need someone.  We all need a line of people who are willing to block for us, willing to pray for us, willing to lay down their life for us.  We need the QB's in life who tell us where to stand, tell us to get our head in the game when we keep messing up, and who tell us they believe in us enough for them to share their life plan with us.  God knows are strengths and our weaknesses and I believe he gives us an army (a team) to help us along the way.  We have to stay unified.  A team divided against itself cannot stand.  You can't have self-seekers or self-righteous people on a team.  Each member is vital to move forward and succeed.  So be mindful of each other loving in the way God loves us.

I apologize to those of you reading this who don't love sports but I have learned so much about life through sports.  And God is in every part of my life so He speaks to me through those experiences.  I love the thrill of a game and the drive and determination that comes with it.  I want my boys to have drive.  I want them to be determined.  I want them to be passionate about their dreams and know that with faith all things are possible. I want them to press on and never give up.  I want them to dream dreams that only God can help them accomplish.  I want them to stand up for good and fight for their team.  I want them to have people in their life who pray for them and lift them up.  I want God to place people in their life who will hold on with them, run along side them so they make it to the end zone.  And when they make it there, I want to see all of them celebrating and rejoicing together.  That is what football is all about.  That is what life is all about.

Thanks again for reading this!  I am glad you are all a part of my life team even if we don't cheer for the same "football" team.
Go Eagles!  Go Texans!

Oh God! This Parenting Thing Ain't Easy!

The other day my mom called to tell me that Bryan and I were doing a great job raising our boys.  She had them that day and something set her off to tell us that.  I thought it was a great compliment coming from my mom who I am sure is a fan of mine either way.  I told her that I had good examples to learn from. She did get on to me for telling my kids not to ask her for anything.  I understand that grandparents are suppose to spoil their grand kids and love on them constantly.  But I told my mom that she wouldn't be complimenting my kids behavior if we weren't constantly on them.  We both laughed and agreed.  My parents were strict and at the time I did not understand it.  But it was those boundaries that kept me from totally falling off the deep end.  Was I perfect? Well of course not! And none of my friends need to share stories proving that I am not.  But I can honestly say that this parenting thing isn't easy. Sometimes I feel like a complete failure and then other days I feel like I barely survived another day.

I am absolutely enjoying the age my kids are at now.  Recently, Bryan and I were in a restaurant next to a couple who had a toddler and an infant.  The parents were having to eat in shifts because the baby was very fussy.  It did not bother us at all because we have been there.  Fortunately, we are past the bottles, potty training and temper tantrum stages.  They know how to use a spoon and fork and drink in a real glass without a lid. They don't need me to carry them anymore.  They wipe their own behinds.  They may mutter things under their breath that I can't hear, but they don't throw themselves on the floor and wiggle around like a slimy fish.  We are on the verge of the teenage years so I may be writing my blog from a totally different perspective in another few months.  Lord willing, I will still like my kids ages in another couple of years especially as one is entering Middle School.  All I can say regarding that is to be continued...

Growing up in a very self serving society, it can be difficult to teach kids to be givers and to think of others first.  We have worked very hard to give our kids all that they need and want.  There is a fine line on giving them those things without them developing a spoiled attitude.  We have encouraged them to save money and buy things on their own.  That is how my oldest bought his Ipad and he has taken very good care of it.  Now there has been the time when little brother can't use it and we have to remind older brother that if he won't let his brother use "his" Ipad then he can't use "our" electricity to charge it.  I think we proved our point.  We have tried to show them how important is to give.  Bo is my giver.  He is always making pictures for people.  He is the one who wants to buy his teachers expensive gifts and is always saying sweet things.  Christian has a sweet spirit but tends to be introverted when it comes to this.  But Christian will have moments in his giving that will make your heart melt.  I also try to explain to my kids the importance of humility.  They both do well in many areas, but let's face it, none of us like braggers.  So how do you teach that?  Well you explain to them the difference between being confident and being cocky. We also tell them how when you are arrogant, you have to remember there is always someone out there who is bigger, better, faster and stronger than you who will shove that arrogance right back in your face.  My oldest has always been very humble.  Someone will compliment him after a game and he just shrugs it off like it is no big deal.  But he has also had moments where he was over confident and got his butt handed to him by someone shorter and faster with equal or less skill.  It is amazing how two kids raised in the same household can be so different.  And it so great to see how much of yourself you can see in them.  I say all the time that I fall in love with Bryan more everyday when I see the glimpses of his spirit in each one of my boys.

There are daily challenges with children.  Loving them is easy but raising them is tough.  I have often found myself in situations of not knowing what is the right thing to do or the right thing to say to them.  This weekend was a perfect example.  Christian has been complaining of his back hurting for a few weeks now. Both Bryan and I decided it was just a muscle and even took him to a chiropractor friend of ours.  He gave us some exercises and stretches to do with our rapidly growing boy.  After weeks of stretching, we headed to the National Primetime Tournament in Dallas.  After our second game to play I was highly frustrated with Christian because I felt like he was just complaining and whining about a simple back pain.  It was one of those moments when I gave him the "suck it up" and "your team needs you" speech.  I felt I had the upper-hand at that moment and was sure I had broken him and he was given new revelation.  But a day later while helping him stretch he could barely lift his leg and his eyes began to water as we continued his stretches.  Talk about feeling like mom of the year.  I realized my son was in pain.  As he walked to the restroom, I began to cry and ask for some heavenly wisdom.  It is in those moments that you would do anything to have God speak audibly to you regarding your kids welfare.  I called in another favor for some advice from my chiropractor friend and he told me things to do.  He said he could play and then he would see him soon.  We iced him up, stretched him and let him play because he wanted to.  But before we left that room, Bryan and I did what we know how to do as parents.  We laid hands on him and prayed.  I will tell you that I am not a great parent but I am one feisty prayer warrior when it comes to my kids.  I refuse to let an enemy take away the gifts and talents that the Lord has blessed my boy with.  I knew Christian heard the tears in my voice.  At that time and place, my tears were saying, son I love you, believe in you and nothing is going to hurt you because you're God's child.  He played his game and played great and I was so thankful.  God is good and when I don't know what to do, I know that I can always pray.

I do feel honored to say that we teach our kids to pray.  Our kids know that our house will serve the Lord.  They know that we give God all the glory for the blessings in our life.  I think the best way to show them the love of the Lord and for the Lord is by example.  We pray every night with our kids.  We lay hands on them and we pray for other people's needs.  I know they listen because when I am tired or sick, Bo will tuck me in and put his hand on me and pray.  They both come home with people who they think we should pray for.  We had a neighbor who was going through an illness and Christian took that need to his Sunday school teacher at the time.  This is how I know that my kids listen.  They know that God answers prayer.  I don't know if they pray on their own when they aren't with us but I believe good seed is planted in them and the good Lord will follow them all of their days.

You may not agree with all of my parenting skills.  I know that I have so many things to learn.  But I know that God chose me to be the mom of these two boys.  And I know that Bryan and I through the Lord's guidance will figure this parenting thing out.  I will make the wrong choice and my kids will make mistakes.  But I will trust the Lord to guide my steps and give me wisdom when I need it.  I will count on His grace and mercy to follow my boys wherever they go.  Like your children, I know my boys have purpose.  They will do greater things than Bryan and I have ever done.  I trust in their character and I am confident in the one who holds the key to their future.  You may not be a perfect parent but remember you were chosen.  Believe in your kids and speak great things about who they are and what they will become.  They are a reflection of you just as you are a reflection of the Father.  Guide them, teach them, discipline them, pray with them.  The same hands I have disciplined with, I have also prayed with.  Most of all, love them as the Lord loves you.  Always remember, we are in this together.  My dear friends and family, I am praying for all of you and your children.

God Bless!

What I learned on Vacation-Frio River 2013

Well I am sitting here taking a break from trying to clean my house, after being gone a week to the Frio River.  It was my first time to ever visit Garner and I have to say it is as beautiful as everyone has always described it to me.  This was also the first time I ever vacationed with 3 other families.  We got to go to Canyon Lake with one other family last year and had a blast, but this year I wasn't so sure about 3 families.  Let's just say we had a total of 8 adults, 3 teenage girls and 6 young boys all sharing a 5 bedroom house.  I have to admit I was a little leery about it all, but it was an eye awakening experience and I enjoyed myself to the fullest.
First, I learned that each family is created uniquely.  And that is a good thing.  They all have their own way of doing things.  Some live out of their suitcases the entire time while others unpack everything and put it in drawers and closets.  Some stack their shoes nice and neat while others find one flip flop under the couch and the other floating in the pool.  Some shower every day and some (mostly kids) think a dip in the river constitutes as a shower.  Some get darker by the sun, others get golden and some just fry.  Some like grape jelly and some like strawberry.  Some like to inch their way into the cold water and others just dive in.  Some kids eat everything in sight while mine remain the pickiest eaters of all.  Some are night owls and others, like myself, are yawning by 10 p.m.  Some drink coffee for a boost of energy and some drink a diet Dr. Pepper to start the day off.  My point is that we are all different and I love that!  It is about taking those differences and making it work.  Sometimes you take a little and other times you give a lot.  It may not always be your way but your way may not be the best way.   We were all placed together with a common interest and were able to enjoy ourselves.  God asks us to love one another.  Such an important commandment and probably one of the hardest for us to keep.  But God has his fingerprints all over us and I am thankful that we are all created in His image.  Though we are uniquely made we are put together to do this thing called life.  So thankful I can enjoy life with some great families.

Secondly, I learned that there are still people out there who value family and marriage.  I was able to spend 5 days with people who love their spouses and actually enjoy being with them.  Together, they create something dynamic that can take on the world and its challenges.  These special bonds are passed on to their children.  You saw a group of kids who actually didn't mind hanging with their parents.  I know this could change at any time but I love to embrace the moment and wish I could freeze it still.  And because our hearts are so full, it is easy to give the excess to the kids who aren't even ours.  There were a lot of laughs and a lot of smiles along the way.   Every couple looked out for each other's kids like they were their own.  Isn't this what the Lord wants us to do?  He asks us to carry each other's burdens and to encourage one another.  We have to look out for each other.  I have many friends who I didn't go on vacation with that are a great example of this also.  Sure, there will be times when we don't always agree and we may get on each other's nerves but we are called to carry each other through the twist and turns of life.  There will be circumstances where you will need a community of people who think the way you do, love the way you do and pray the way you do.  It brings me joy to know there are people in my life who value the same things that I do.

Lastly, I was reminded that God didn't just created the Heavens and the Earth.  He created me to enjoy His creation and to take care of it.  I have never been one to want to travel the world but there is so much I haven't seen.  I was taken back by the beautiful country in Leakey and Garner.  We couldn't have asked for a better vacation spot.  We got to wake up every morning to trees and mountains and all the sounds the animals make.  On the morning of our 14th wedding anniversary Bryan and I got to sit on the front porch and drink coffee and just talk.  We talked about the blessings in our life and how God is just so amazing!  The God who created such beautiful scenery also created the man who was sitting beside me in a rocking chair.  I was reminded just how much I love Bryan even after 16 years together.  There was no one else in that moment that I wanted sitting beside me enjoying all that God had created.  When I look into Bryan's eyes, I see my two brown-eyed boys and my heart is full.  We got to enjoy, as a family, what God made.  God is so good to us!

What a great vacation!  Thank you Lord for being the creator of the universe.  Thank you Lord for supplying my every need and giving me extra to be able to enjoy this beautiful land.  Thank you for people who aren't like me in every way but are like me in so many good ways.  Thank you for our unique DNA but also for the same hearts who long after you.  Thank you for new adventures but also for the common ground we walk on. God is great, friends are good, and people are crazy!

Until we meet again Frio River!
Hope

I love men! Happy Father's Day

As Father's Day approaches, I know many people have mixed emotions.  Some people rejoice in the day because they are able to celebrate the special men in their lives.  Some dread the day because it brings up bad memories of having a horrible dad or the absence of one.  Others will feel a sense of void because they have lost that special man in their lives.  Regardless of the circumstances, I feel it is important to recognize the special men in my life.  Please know that I am sensitive to those who have bad memories of their father due to abuse or abandonment or other reasons. 

With that aside, I do feel that sometimes we give men a bad wrap.  I could sit here and tell you about my dad's faults but I know that he is not perfect.  My parents divorced when I was still a toddler.  I do remember my Dad always picking me up when it was his turn to have me.  I know he would do everything in his power to protect me. My Dad is a macho man who can be hard at times but I always have known he loves me.  We didn't have the closest relationship growing up but that has changed a lot since I have been married and had kids of my own.  I can look back now and see that my Dad may not be perfect but he has influenced my life in so many ways that I can't thank him enough for.  I still will never forget the butt-whoopin I got from him from spilling milk in his truck.  We laugh about that all the time now.  He always practiced softball with me and made me the best 3rd basemen I could be.  He is the only one who calls me by my middle name "Diamond."  I won't even give Bryan permission to call me that.  He is the first to always call me on my birthday even if it is at 6 in the morning.  He has always worked hard from sun up to sun down and with his hands.  He taught me to mow and Bryan should thank him for that because I love to mow now.  Just the other day I sent him a picture of Christian mowing the yard.  His response was "the yard man stops with me."  I don't feel that way at all.  I love my Dad for being a hard worker.  I admire that about him!  He has his ways but he is my Dad and I thank God for the influence he has had in my life and for loving me the best way he knows how.

Now with Bryan in my life, I have been able to see fatherhood in a different light.  I fall in love with that man more each day when I see him with our kids.  He would give up everything just to know his kids are happy and safe.  He is a disciplinarian but he is the fun one.  He wrestles.  He raps.  He shoots baskets, throws footballs and swings bats.  He goes to school parties even if sometimes he is the only Dad there.  He makes 3 different types of breakfast each morning.  He is the one who rubs their backs when they relax on the couch.  He tells them he is proud of them often.  He gives hugs and says "I love you."    He doesn't just get on to them when they do wrong, he sits down and explains things to them.  He says he is sorry to them when he is wrong even if he isn't wrong very often.  He doesn't just take them to church, he is a walking example of a Godly father.  He lays hands on them when they go to bed and prays for them often.  He not only loves his own kids but he has tons of others in his life that he treats like his own.  I don't know how much more I can love that man. But when I see the brown in my boy's eyes sparkle,  I see their Daddy even more.  Thank you God for blessing me with Bryan Rhodes.

I am so fortunate to have great men in my life.  I addition to my father and Bryan, I have had the privilege of getting to know an amazing man who has become my step dad.  He loves my mom and has made her happy and is one of the most giving people I know.  My brothers are doing outstanding jobs with their kids as well.  I also have the privilege of working with some great men.  Each one of them love their kids so much and you can see their faces light up when they talk about them.  They are family men who provide and are active in their kid's lives.  I am also grateful to the men who have coached my boys, taught them, and who have just been family friends.  Those men have made a difference in my boy's lives by their own choice.  Men don't realize just how important they are to us.  They are called to such an important job and I am thankful that many of them rise up to it.  Thank you guys for being such a great part of my life and my boy's lives.  Sure you stink at times and laugh at the most obnoxious things, and leave the toilet seat up, and hurt our feelings by some random thing you say.  But you also make us feel safe, stand up for what is right, kill the nasty bug crawling across the floor, and makes us feel loved like no one else can.  You men rock!

Before I go, I have to thank my Heavenly father.  Without Him in my life, I am nothing.  His love for me cannot be compared.  His love is flawless and endless.  He only gives me the best and He is showing me over and over again just how much He has planned for me.  Thank you Lord for being the greatest father of all.

Unfinished Projects

I do have to start out by saying that I apologize if most of my blogs have to with running or sports.  But this seems to be my inspiration for writing right now.

Last Saturday Bryan and I went out for a run before Christian's basketball tournament.  I hadn't ran 4 miles since last December so I wasn't totally looking forward to it especially in this Texas heat.  When we got to the park, I realized that I forgot my ipod.  This is a sin in my book.  I have to have music to run.  Those of you that know me, know that music is a big part of my life and I listen to everything.  If you grabbed my ipod, you would hear everything from Kid Rock, to George Jones, to Donna Summer to Disciple mixed in with a little Bob Marley.  So needless to say, I was not looking forward to a run without my tunes.  Bryan told me that it would be a good time for me to pray.  Pray? Really?  I don't mind praying but I can't do it when I am running.  I will usually start out by saying "Lord help me to endure, give me strength."  Then I usually start singing something like "Humpty Dance" or something totally not something I would sing in church.

Despite the lack of music, I had to put my big girl panties on and run anyway.  Surprisingly, I made it through and caught a little perspective along the way.  I was asking the Lord to help me finish the run.  As I began to ask for this, I felt some conviction.  I though about all of the unfinished projects in my life.  Sure I can name things at my house that are unfinished.  In order to protect my husband, I will not call him out on such things.  But I know that I have pictures scattered all in my front room that I have been needing to organize and put away.  They have become such great decorations for the floor.  I have used items that are piled up in the garage that I need to either tag for a garage sale or just donate.  While all of these things need to get done and I need to get disciplined about doing them, I am more concerned with all of the things I have not finished regarding the Kingdom. 

A while back I started writing letters to people who had influenced my life and had planned to mail those out to them.  I have yet to complete them.  I have made so many promises to God that I know I have failed to keep.  So there I was asking the Lord to help me finish, to help me endure and I realized that there is so much I haven't done for Him that I said I would.  Now I know that we are not saved by our works but when we follow God we want to do good things and are often prompted to do them too.  I am humbled by His grace and I am thankful that His love for me is not based on my performance.  I am grateful that just because I don't keep my promises doesn't mean that He doesn't keep His.  He reassures me that even though there are things that I do not finish, He still believes in me and will equip me with all that I need to finish.  He doesn't write me off just because I fail to complete what I initially set out to do.  Instead, He takes me right where I am and gives me another chance.

I have so many dreams and so many things I want to do and be in life.  I want to be a better wife and mother and I am daily working on that.  I want to learn to say "I am sorry" more often. I want to not get tired in being the bigger person.  I want to be in a position to bless people and encourage them with my words and my finances.  I want to read my bible more.  I want to never go a day without praying.  As I write these sentences on paper, I can't help but think that I am going to screw this up.  Just today, my stomach hurts and my head is full of the stresses of life.  And I want to sit down and play candy crush all night just to clear my head.  But instead, I am writing this to bring some healing to my own heart and mind. 

I ask you to look into your own life and see if there are any "unfinished" projects.  Are there things you have started that you want to finish?  Are there promises you have made that you were unable to keep?  Is there someone in your life that you have put on the back burner that may need you right at this moment?  Are there dreams you have that you have buried beneath your current circumstance?  Know today that God knows exactly where you are at in life.  He knows your current situation.  He takes you right where you are and gives you all that you need to pick back up.  He always keeps his promises and He never fails us.  We are like unfinished clay that the potter is continuing to sculpt to create a beautiful masterpiece.  Just as God doesn't give up on us, we should never give up on becoming more like Him.  Whether it is a walk, a jog, or a full out sprint, make sure you finish the race.  The reward will be more than we could ever fathom.

Blessings,
Hope

Running, Basketball & Friends

So much has gone on from last Sunday until today.  On Sunday, May 5th I had a group of 24 people, who I consider super important in my life, run the Lupus 5K with me.  It wasn't my first 5K but this race meant so much more to me.  My mom and I both have lupus and I have missed this race every year.  This year I was determined to fit it into my schedule.  When I set out to enter the race I never expected the response I would get from family and friends.  I had a huge support group! For some, it was their first 5K to ever do.  Each person had a different goal.  Others just wanted to run without stopping.  Some wanted to beat a certain time. Some just wanted to finish the race.  This race wasn't just about lupus.  This was about rising up against life's challenges.  This was about running towards a goal and not letting anything drag you down. 

Sure we all face different obstacles and we all have our way of dealing with them.  Some of us sprint towards the finish line while some of us have to stop and catch our breath before moving forward.  But in the end, we all cross the finish line.  It was so cool getting to see the people I knew making their way towards the end.  All I could say was "That one is on my team!"  Isn't that how life should be?  We should all run this race together.  We should all encourage one another daily.  Whether we finished first or we finished last, we all had the same smile to go along with our sweat.  I feel like God is looking at us as we go through this thing called life.  He wants us to get to the finish line.  He wants to look and say "that one is on my team."  He rejoices when we don't give up.  He gives us strength when we want to quit. He breathes into us when we can't seem to catch our own breath.  He sends people along the way to lift us up and motivate us when we need an extra boost.  I am so thankful for every person who took time out of their Sunday to run with me.  There is power in numbers and I am so glad you are on my team.  We did it!

After the race there was no time for slowing down.  We headed to Canton, TX on Wednesday for the Little Dribblers National Tournament.  I got to travel with some of the same people who were on my 5K team.  This time our goal was different.  We were there to cheer on our kids as they played for a national championship title.  As parents, we were so excited to see our team play and we were anxious as to what the other teams might bring onto the court.  We have a great group of boys with big hearts who reflect the parents that are raising them.  We fell short of the title but the experience was great.  We played some giants with some fancy moves and a lot of swagger.  Our boys aren't quite so big and play what I would call "clean" basketball.  But I watched them get out there and face these giants.  At times they were intimidated but they gathered their composure and faced them head on for four quarters.  They missed some passes, took some falls, and had some shots blocked. 

I can only relate this back to life.  Sometimes we face things that are bigger than us, problems that are too big for us to handle.  And though our knees may tremble and our hearts beat fast, we stay focused.  We ask God for courage and strength and He gives it to us.  We may not always get the trophy but greater is our reward in heaven.  Always play with integrity and with heart.  God doesn't look at the outside but at the inside.  Just as God beams with pride when He sees us so did we when we looked at our boys.  Sometimes we only point out what they could have done better or what they didn't do.  But they do so many things right and I want to remember that.  They got back up, they sunk some beautiful shots, and they rebounded several balls.  Again, this experience was about more than basketball.  It was about community.  We all cheered for eachother's kid and truly wanted each one to do their best.  I couldn't be happier being a part of a group of people who share the same values and who truly desire to see the best in each kid.

Through these experiences, I was able to see God's love for me.  He loves me so much and he has sent so many wonderful people in my life to display His love.  Talk about divine appointments!  I truly believe that so many have come into my life for a reason.  I have had happy moments, sad moments and even moments of frustration.  But these people have been there with me through it all.  We don't always agree but we have a common purpose.  We are all seeking to be the best friends, mothers, fathers, wives, husbands and children of God that we can be.  God wanted us to fellowship and to encouarage one another daily.  I am so thankful that he has picked some of the best people for me and my family.

Lord I thank you for each person in my life today.  I pray that they know how important they are to me.  And Lord if they don't know, help me to show them.  Help me to never take them for granted.  I pray that you watch over each one of them and their families.  Lord bless them abundantly because they are your children.  Give them the desires of their hearts as they delight themselves in you.  Thank you for showing me how much you love me and my children and using them to show me just that.  Lord help me to keep my eyes and heart open to receive anyone else you bring into my life.  Thank you Lord for loving me, my friends, and my family.