Monday, November 12, 2018

Good bye Football, Hello Future!

Well I can't believe it is here.  We are nearing the end of football season.  We are almost at the end of your days of participating in High School sports.  Man, where did the time go?  This momma doesn't want it to end.  We have shared so many memories and have met some of our closest friends along the way.  We have enjoyed the fans and some have become life long fans of yours.  I can't say I am ready to turn the page just yet.  Deep breaths...

I remember when you were born, and we knew we were having a boy, there was never a question that you would play sports.  T-ball was first and your Daddy was so excited to be out there coaching you.  Then the other sports followed.  You played everything from pitcher to short stop to running back to quarterback to point guard in basketball.  We always thought you would play it all.
Of course Daddy's favorite sport was baseball and it stung a bit when you came to us in 5th grade and said you didn't want to play it anymore.  Nonetheless, we let you make the decision and made you tell your coach on your own.  You handled it and just like that a chapter was closed.

But we still had basketball and football and even track.  Daddy still got to coach you some until you outgrew his skill level.  I sat and watched and cheered you on. I have washed numerous uniforms, and have taken many road trips.  I had to make a 10 hour drive with one of our favorite families to a national tournament for basketball.  I wouldn't trade those moments for anything.  I have yelled at you, yelled at refs, tried to calm your Dad down when there was a bad call.   I have disciplined you when you were in the wrong.  I have chewed you out when I thought you weren't giving it your all.   I cringed seeing your tears when Daddy was a little too hard on you.  You always took it like a champ.  He could always bring out the best and you and it made you the player you are today.  You have had some amazing coaches along the way but I think Dad is the best coach you ever had.  He is your life coach.

Then one day you decided football was going to be it for you.  This would be the game you would love to play.  I will admit it was hard for me.  I still want to see you on a basketball court but you continue to show me that you can make your own decisions about your life and you turn out just fine.
But why choose one of the roughest sports when you are one of the smallest bodies out there?  This sport has delivered you a surgery for a broken finger, one concussion, a swollen knee, staples above the eyebrow, numerous turf burns, a fractured heel and back sprain.  With each injury comes a story.  The story is your story.  We have seen God move in you through these times and in your life.  We have watched him carry you through the times you had to sit.  This sport has made you a tough young man.  I have watched you get hit so hard it makes my stomach turn.  I have watched you take a little longer to get up at times, but you still got up.  I have watched you high five your teammates when they make a big play.  I have watched you mentor the younger players coming up after you.  I have watched you be frustrated but still give it your all.  I have felt every touch down, every catch, every drop, every fumble.  I have tuned out the people hollering at you from the stands but also have smiled when they cheer you on.  I have sweated so much sitting in the blazing sun during 7 on 7 tournaments and have frozen my behind off sitting on cold bleachers.  I have woken you up on game days with a loud "Game Day" yell.  We have played game day songs.  We have played everything from ACDC to Johnny Cash to War to Bob Marley.   We have made game day breakfasts.  Daddy has helped you learn to tie the perfect tie so you can look sharp for game days.  Game days require a sharp dressed man.  I have sent a game day text to my fellow mommas every game day since you started school sports.  I have waited up till you got home from the game just so I can put my eyes on you to make sure you are good.  I have to see those eyes to know.  Son, I have had the time of my life watching you play a sport you are passionate about.

While it is almost the end of your Senior year of football, I can only look to your future.  God has shown me that there is so much more to you than just football.  Even though I wouldn't trade these moments I know they are just one small piece of your life.  You really can change the world.  I am most proud of your character.  You may not always make the right decisions and you may not always say the right things.  But I know and God knows that you are destined for great things.  I have seen you on stages talking about your faith.  I have seen you around kids and humbling yourself knowing they look up to you.  I have watched you lead a crowd.  I have watched you stand strong even when the crowd was against you.  Your path is guided by the Lord and I know you look to Him.  I have had many great discussions with you about your faith.  You will impact kids as you decide to make that a career path.  Me and your Daddy will continue to be there every step of the way.
So go after your future and grab someone along the way and pull them up with you.  Work hard, stay humble.  Remember to be still and listen for God's voice.  Don't be afraid to make tough decisions.  Learn from your mistakes.  There is a time to sit and a time to move.  Learn from the sitting times.
Greater is He that is within you, than he that is in the world.
Son, it doesn't end here.  This is only the beginning.  Another chapter is closing but I am ready to read the next one.  If it has you in it, I am there.  I always will be.

But first...Let's go kick some Manvel booty!  Playoffs 2018!  #Seniors19

Monday, May 21, 2018

I haven't prayed

With all that is going on in the world today I thought I needed to make a confession.  You see I am a prayer warrior.  I love to pray with people and for people.  I am that person who will pray for you if you ask me to.  Now I have to admit I may not say some long prayers or spend hours locked up in a prayer closet, but nonetheless, I will pray for you.  You can bet on it.

But I have to let you in on a little secret.  I realized today that I hadn't prayed in a week.  There I said it.  I said some prayers for others here and there but I didn't open my mouth for myself or my own family and a whole week had passed.  I just gave up.  The truth is I am tired, exhausted, busy, and just stagnant.  This just cannot be and I am ashamed to admit it.  It's the ugly truth.
At a time when my kids need the most prayer and my husband needs my prayers, I just don't have the words to utter.  Surely God knows my heart and he knows what I need before I even ask him.  But I don't even have the common courtesy to tell him hello.  I may have given him a casual and nonchalant "thank you" here and there but what happened to my deep conversations with God?

All I see is chaos in the world right now and occasional bursts of chaos in my own home.  I can't help but think about the praying moms out there.  Maybe y'all are better at this than me.  Maybe you are on day 256 of your bible reading plan and haven't missed a beat.  I was doing good and then I opened my app and had missed 5 days in a row.  And I can't stand to have a missed day notification so I cram all 5 days in and don't truly reflect on what I just read.  It's all a blur.  Does anyone else ever feel this way?  This is reality people.

There are so many things going on in the world today.  And I know everybody says it requires action and not just prayer.  I am not being political here.  I totally agree but I think the first action we must make is to pray.  And it starts with us moms in our own homes for our own families.  Ladies we hold so much power in our family.  We have such big hearts and wide spread arms to love our families and to hold them in times of need.  God crafted us to be meek and kind but he also made us to be bold and strong.  Sometimes we have to dig our heels (whatever size you choose to wear) in and stand for our husbands and kids in prayer.  I know I have to put my big (bigger than ever) girl panties on and pray.  I know I have friends and family who have my back but they don't live in my house each day.  I have to fight for my family.  I have to pray for their protection from such an evil world we live in.  I have to pray for favor in the decisions they make regarding their futures.  I have to pray for the boldness to defend my family of unwarranted attacks that come against them.  I have to pray for the grace to not totally go psycho on my kids when they act like fools.  I have to pray for my house to be a house full of joy and love and peace.  This is my house and God gave me this life and blessed me with these humans that live in it.  I can't fall asleep on my watch Lord.  I just can't.

There is no better time to start than now if you haven't ever started.  We can't wait till all is quiet and calm in our home.  We have to pray NOW!  And it doesn't have to be a fancy prayer full of all the right biblical terms.  This is just an honest conversation between you and God.  It has to come from the deep down places of your soul even if that means an emotional outburst.  But we simply can't afford to sit back and wait for someone else to pray for our family.  I am never shy about asking for prayer from some of my biggest prayer warriors when I can't do it myself.  However, I know my own family better than anyone else.  God chose me and all my flaws and gave me all the words I need to pray for my loved ones.  Yes it was so much simpler when they were younger and I was tucking them into bed each night.  Things were easy when we recited the usual children's prayers.  But they are older now and things are much more real.  The things this world throws at them requires some different types of prayers.  It requires a momma who is willing to kick off her shoes, if need be, and get down in the thick of things no matter how dark the situation is.

I know some of you may be saying "Hope I have tried this and it doesn't work."  I have been there too.  I don't have all of the exact answers as to why bad things happen to good people.  I have prayed countless prayers for protection over my kids and one continues to suffer injury over and over again.  I have prayed for direction over our futures and have not gotten any clear answers.  I have prayed for clarity and still made wrong choices.  Mommas, I truly understand.  But when I have prayed I have put my soul at rest.   My confidence comes from knowing that God and I have talked and he will work on my family's behalf.  He will see the work he started through to completion.  Bad things may still happen but God will work ALL things out for our good.  I may cry and throw a temper tantrum but at least I know my heavenly father is listening.  Open your mouth Hope.  Mommas, open your mouths.

Each of us has our own style and our prayers may not sound the same and that's how it should be.  Some of you whisper tenderly while others may let out a shout.  You know your home, set the tone for it, and possess the words to be spoken over your family.  God didn't choose anyone else but you to be the wife of your husband and the mother of your kids.  Don't let the enemy get you so busy and so tired that you forget to open your mouth and pray.  I am talking to myself here.  It's time for me to stand again and that may require some kneeling too.  Whatever position you choose to pray from it just starts with a humble heart and an open soul.  We've got this moms!  Ain't no devil in Hell that can take on a praying momma on a mission with God on her side.

If momma ain't happy ain't nobody truer words have ever been spoken.

Graduation 2019

Today I packed the last sack lunch for my oldest son.  Yes, I have made his lunch every day since he was in school, give or take a few sick ...